Here I am sitting in front of the computer wondering how or where to begin. I found blogging times much easier when I tried everyday to make a post and I was always on the hunt for something to write about. It didn't always have to be funny, serious, or interesting just writing and I felt great afterward. But, honestly since I have just stopped posting I just really haven't felt like getting back into it even after the promise to try to do better. I find myself forgetting my camera for great opportunities to take picture and document my time not only for ya'll but for myself as well.
Monday I was able to go to Jacksonville and visit a grandmother I haven't seen in about 8 or 9 years. And, it wasn't because I didn't want to, we had just lost contact through my moving and divorce and she had moved and so I had no clue how to get ahold of her. I had several emotions going on when I called to see if we could come and visit. I was deeply saddened when she told me that my grandfather had died back in Feb. and all she could do was tell me how lonely she was and how much she cried for him and longed to be with him. And, here I am thinking selfishly because I am like Granny we just got back in touch I need time to talk to connect again. I was not wanting to hear those words from her. It was very difficult, she seemed so different. I hurt for her I wanted to help in some way that I could and I didn't know how other than to pray. So, that is what I did.
We (my sister and I, with my 3 kids and her 1) stayed for hours trying to catch up on all the years we have missed and all the conversations we would have had. We talked about how much we miss our mother and the fact that we no longer are as close as we used to be. A lifestyle can separate you from your family. I suffer through that everyday also. I miss MY family. I miss the fun we used to have. I do have another family, my husbands family and they have stepped up quite nice. But, there is nothing like have your family, parents, grands, sisters, brother, uncles, aunts, cousins, and children. I don't want you to think that I am complaining on this Thanksgiving day, but loneliness can set in at any time and during any holiday.
I am thankful that my Granny does have other grand children that live near her and are there for her. I know this Holiday she is with family, but I also know that she doesn't feel whole without my grandfather.
So, on this Thanksgiving Day. I am most thankful for the time I do get to spend with my family, even if my kids are off somewheres else.
May God bless this day for you and your family